47Hops is pleased to announce the newest and most proprietary product to hit the hop industry … ever … Hopi Luwak™. This revolutionary new product is an all-natural and fully renewable hop pellet sure to create a movement in the brewing industry. We produce Hopi Luwak™ sustainably because we care about the environment.
Hopi Luwak™ comes from the Latin (Paradoxurus hermaphrodites) a process originating high in the mountains of Indonesia. For years we probed and evaluated this ancient, rare and highly selective processing technique known only to a select few. We applied the Luwak™ process to hops to create a pre-fermented product. Hopi Luwak™ is guaranteed to bring an unprecedented new Earthy flavor to any beer.
To preserve the sensitive resins and oils, we produce Hopi Luwak™ at a mean temperature of an Asian Livet. This is cooler than average T-90 hop pellet production temperatures, and significantly cooler than other known pelleting operations.
Hopi Luwak™ will enable us as a hop merchant to market hops that would otherwise be difficult to sell. Furthermore, we plan to make it available through companies we like and work with. We will control the entire process. We will decide who has access, and we will decide what prices they will pay. Competition in the industry is really tough right now so we had to do something. We decided a new product would make us look very creative and so much smarter than our competitors. Because we are so smart, we expect our new product to wipe out the competition, but don’t expect us to dump it on the market. It has cost us a load to develop this new exciting new product. They will be hella expensive, probably even double your normal hop bill. Ka-ching! $$$
Processing via the Luwak™ method is filled with twists and turns. We successfully passed them for YOU, our readers. We are confident it will take a while for the claims that Hopi Luwak™ is just snake oil to appear in the market. If Hopi Luwak™ sounds familiar perhaps you are very well traveled or have an eclectic coffee habit. Yes, we’ve borrowed the name from the infamous, and ridiculously expensive Kopi Luwak coffee beans collected from the poop of the Luwak of Indonesia.
YES … this article is a spoof on some of the ridiculous innovation happening in the hop industry today. Please don’t write us ordering any Hopi Luwak™ … although, if enough of you do … who knows … we might have to go to Indonesia!
Hop merchants today overstate the importance of their innovations that basically result in incremental changes in the form in which the product is sold and slight changes to its performance. They hype them up and play everybody else’s products down. It’s all just lipstick on a pig, and we’re good with that. At the end of the day, the flavor of the other guy’s snake oil doesn’t matter if their customer service sucks. At 47Hops, we’re focusing on great quality, no B.S., amazing customer service … not snake oil.